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October 5, 2013

How To Lose Weight Fast While Prepping For The Impending Zombie Apocalypse By T.L. Campbell

The world has gone insane during the apocalyptic day where zombies walk the earth. Your chances for survival are probably slim. Lets face it you’ve put on a few pounds and your endurance level has crashed through the floor. You will never outrun the living dead. So what do you do? What is the mother of all secrets to weight loss and the perfect set of ABS?

HOW TO LOSE WEIGHT FAST While Prepping For The Impending Zombie Apocalypse is a serious, but humorous and entertaining approach to becoming fit. This book takes the work out of workout.

Enjoy news flashes from our correspondents in the zom-ridden field as well as several mini missions that you will enjoy exercising with and so much more. This book will prepare you to face anything with increased endurance and confidence.

Download this zombie-themed health guide on Amazon, Barnes and Noble and Smashwords.

Excerpt

NEWS FLASH! 
This just in from our correspondent in the field:

Malcolm was always overweight and possibly the regular butt of jokes in the class throughout his childhood. When the zombie apocalypse descended on his town the entire community and Malcolm’s family suddenly found themselves under siege from a band of gypsies that had been slaughtered by an unknown force, but survived into a form of living dead, just two miles from Malcolm’s parents’ home where he also lived.Although the security forces and the police had been called they could find not a sign of the zombies, and nobody knew where they had gone. It was not until the authorities had given up and gone that the maggot-ridden undead came out of hiding and this was about to become a huge issue for 16-year old Malcolm.Malcolm and his three best friends, Roger, Pete and Dave decided to wander down to the derelict gypsy camp. Malcolm’s friends were slim and fit and regularly hounded him to keep up as they bounced with enthusiasm towards the former gypsy camp.

Upon arriving at the derelict campsite on the outskirts of town, they all found a number of caravans that had been clearly trashed and vandalized with dirty net curtains blowing in the wind. Suddenly Malcolm heard a noise from one of the caravans and it sounded like a man in great pain. Roger, Dave and Pete spun on their heels and ran leaving Malcolm rooted to the spot.

It was then that Malcolm was to experience the most frightening thing he had ever experienced in his life; a zom burst through the caravan door and began to stagger toward him with arms in a position to grab him. Malcolm turned and saw his friends run and he began to waddle through the long grass that surrounded the camp and ran as fast as he could. But his sheer weight hampered his rapid departure and he stumbled on a clump of grass and then tried to gather himself back to his feet but his extra pounds that he carried made the process so much slower. As the zombie descended on Malcolm, his friends watched from a safe distance shook their heads in disbelief that a zombie could catch up to a young man who was still alive and well but just a tad portly.

Malcolm did eventually escape but only by the skin of his chocolate-munching teeth. The close call forced him to go to start losing weight, because his bulk so nearly cost his life!

Tara Maya

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