Blind Picket Author’s Guild

Here’s another view of the Author’s Guild dispute with the Kindle.

The National Federation of the Blind’s Imbroglio with the Author’s Guild and their distaste for the Kindle 2’s text-to-speech function is heating up. Today they took it to the Guild’s own doorstep here in NYC.

Basically the story is this: the Author’s Guild raised issue with the Kindle 2’s new robotic text-to-speech feature, which can read any Kindle book aloud in a synthesized voice—naturally, a feature that would be an absolute delight for the vision impaired. The Author’s Guild, however, saw things differently, stating that eBooks are not sold with “performance” rights and that the Kindle’s read-aloud feature would cut into the sales of audio books. And last month, Amazon caved to the Guild, giving individual publishers the ability to disable the text-to-speech reader for specific books.

…We’re all about getting people paid for their work, but to cite lost royalties and audio book revenues as the main reason to deprive the blind community from the full Kindle archive —which, if you remember, Jeff Bezos hopes will soon include every book ever published—seems kind of ridiculous.

It’s my personal opinion the Author’s Guild is wrong on this — for a number of reasons, though this is one of the more poignant. I say that as someone who would like someday to earn money from selling audio books.

Ending – Twist or Plunge

The End.

I always type those words at the end of my first draft. (Sometimes, if I’m trying to be sophisticated, I type “Fin” instead.) Fins are considered fishy these days, but I still like the taste of them.

There’s a lot to say about endings, and Natalie the Ninja has some good advice on writing endings, especially for those who are nearing the completion of a manuscript right now.

My concern at the moment is a little different. My Secret Novel is not yet begun, never mind near complete. As I’ve mentioned before, I seldom begin a book without knowing how things will end. So, in a sense, this post is actually the counterpart of my discussion of beginnings.

Just as beginnings can be marathons or relays, so endings can be likened to the final run on a roller coaster: the Plunge or the Twist.

The plot of a book is like a roller coaster, full of of ups and downs, twists and curves. At the climax of the ride, you have to decide — how will the ride end? Some roller coasters climb up a big hill. As your car rachets higher and higher on the track, you know it’s going to have to go back down in one huge plunge which will have you screaming your head off.

Or maybe not. Some rides don’t end with one big plunge, but with a final gravity-defying twist which takes you by surprise.

Now, all books, if they are any good at all, have some twists at the end, otherwise they would be thoroughly predictable. But this doesn’t make them Twist Ending books. Take Lord of the Rings. There’s a slight twist at the end involving Frodo and the Golum, but you don’t find out that Sam is actually Sauron.

Compare with the The Life of Pi or with Ender’s Game where at the end, you realize you have been reading a different book than you thought. All through the story you’ve seen things in a certain light, perhaps because the protagonist has seen things this way, but now you realize the protagonist either missed or withheld vital information. The revelation transforms your view of everything which went before.

The Empire Strikes Back ended with a twist. (It’s become cliche now, but at the time, the boy who seeks to avenge his father but finds his enemy is his father was a marvelous twist.) Return of the Jedi ends with a plunge.

I do already know how my Secret Novel needs to end, and it isn’t much of a plunge. The tension rises a bit, perhaps, toward the end, but is it sufficient for a satisfying ride? I’m not sure.

The alternative to a scream-worthy plunge is to throw in a extremely clever twist, so I’m considering that option. Problem — I have no clue what the twist will be. And this is why I can’t start a book before I know the ending, and what kind of ride the book will be.

I have a vague idea involving a postcard.

Endings

The End.

http://betweenfactandfiction.blogspot.com/2009/04/writing-endings.html

First Person

A friend of mine in a writing group said this about writing in First Person:

In general, I think the key to writing effectively in first is about not treating it like third person with a find-and-replace button, he or she swapped out for I in the same sentences, structures, and techniques. For first person present to be truly sustainable at novel length — and, well, more readable in shorter lengths — it has to be more experiential. If I’m telling a story, “No shit, there I was,” I’m telling you about what I saw, how I felt, what my emotional reactions were; how I tell you and even what I tell you will be coloured by what I think of the whole thing.

So the major thing I’d put out there for writing effectively in first would be this: Think about how people actually do tell stories about themselves. What kind of language they use, how casual or formal they are, how they get across their personalities in the style and what they omit and what kinds of things they mention. Think about how they put the listener in the story with them.

I’m toying with the idea of writing my Secret Novel in Multiple First Person. I’m wondering now how different each “voice” should be. My characters are quite diverse in background and age, and I suppose that ought to be reflected in the narrative diction, but I don’t want to draw too much attention to it.

Another Perfect Example of Human Strangeness

“It was such a perfect example of human strangeness that I cried.”

So said the friend who emailed me this.

Me too.

Furthermore, I’ve actually been to the Central Station in Antwerp, Belguim.

Bad Query Contest

I entered a fabulous Bad Query Contest and my query was awful enough to warrant “highly recommended.” Check out the winner and also the list of things which can go terribly awry in a query letter.

Here was mine:

Dear To Whom It May Concern,

What is the most allusive dream which is what Elenor Paige wants? But her husband has missing for forty years. Little does she know her sister knows where he is but is dead. When her sister is a ghost, the other ghosts are tyring to stop her. This is the point in the story where the villain reveals his ability to control all the governments of the world, including the Pope. And this is a conspiracy.

This is is not a stupid book like all of the crap on the shelves. This fiction novel will transforming your sole and make you glad to be life. This is a novel of the triumph of love and beauty and hope and goodness and the importance of freindship over an evil appliance of governments, religions and coroporations to control your brain and make you do what they want. This is a true story, but I change d the names so I wouldn’t get sued again.

You are really stupid if you reject this book like all the other agents I quereid. But you probably will reject it because the Big Money wich is controlilng the Publishing is not really interested in wakening the sheeps but only in making people dumb. I hope you will be smart.

This book is 37,436 words long. Most of it is typed (but I had to hand write one chapter, ok?)

You may think because I am in prison I can’t write a book, but you would be a fool if your really think that. This is a true story, so you should buy it. I have a good markiting plan too. I plan to be on Oprah. I think the Rock should play Bill Blade, the hero of my book, when it is made into a movie. So I will not take you as my agent unless you can promise tot get the Rock to play Bill Blade. Shakira should play Elly, but some other hot chick would be okay too.

Sincerely,
Soon to Be Famous Author

In retrospect, there are so many things I could have done to make the letter even more ghastly. I can’t believe I forgot to type my letter in inch-high pink gothic font against a sparkly orange background with red blinking hearts and dancing skeletons. Why didn’t I include pictures of me, in lingerie, holding my beloved pitbull Killer Pumpkin?