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Daily Archives: September 27, 2012

One Ridiculously Easy Way To Improve Your Manuscript

So you want your writing not to suck. There’s a ridiculously effective way to improve it. It’s easy–once you know how:

Put your manuscript on a diet!

I have a guest post from writing coach extraordinaire, Rayne Hall, with some tips.

Check out all Rayne Hall’s books!

SLIM YOUR WRITING STYLE FOR THE NEW YEAR
 
Does your writing style have bulges and saggy bits? Dr Rayne’s Word Loss Diet helps you to trim, slim, tighten and tone your manuscript. 
In thirty years as an editor, I’ve found the same fatty words bloat the style of many authors.
Here is a notorius, fattening, calorie-rich word: ‘could’.  If you cut it from your diet your writing style will be come sharper and tighter.
Beginner writers are prone to overusing it. Experienced authors  may use it a lot in their drafts, but edit it out in the final version.
Instead of telling us that the heroine could see, could hear, could smell or could feel something, let her see, hear, smell, taste, feel it. Simply cut the word ‘could’.
‘Could see’ becomes ‘saw’, ‘Could hear’ becomes ‘heard’, ‘could smell’ becomes ‘smelled’, ‘ could taste’ becomes ‘tasted’, ‘could feel’ becomes ‘felt’.
Better still: cut ‘see/hear/smell/taste/feel’ as well.  If you have established the point of view of your story, you don’t need to say that your PoV hears the sounds, smells the smells and sees the visions.
Obese version (before diet)
He could hear footsteps clanking down the stairs.
Overweight version (after mild diet)
He heard footsteps clanking down the stairs.
Slim version (after strict diet)
Footsteps clanked down the stairs.
Obese version (before diet)
She could see his lips beginning to twitch.
Overweight version (after mild diet)
She saw his lips beginning to twitch.
Slim version (after strict diet)
His lips twitched.
Obese version (before diet)
She could feel her cheeks firing.
Overweight version (after mild diet)
She felt her cheeks firing.
Slim version (after strict diet)
Her cheeks fired.
Obese version (before diet)
She could sense that something was wrong.
Overweight version (after mild diet)
She sensed that something was wrong.
Slim version (after strict diet)
Something was wrong.
Obese version (before diet)
He could understand that it was time to leave.
Overweight version (after mild diet)
He understood it was time to leave.
Slim version (after strict diet)
It was time to leave.
Obese version (before diet)
He could feel the air chill.
Overweight version (after mild diet)
He felt the air chill.
Slim version (after strict diet)
The air chilled.
Use your wordprocessor’s Find&Replace tool to count how many times you’ve used ‘could’, and cut most of them.
I’d love to hear from you. When you’ve checked your WiP for ‘could’, post a comment to tell me how many you’ve found, and whether you’re going to cut some of them.
What other ‘wordy words’ do you think writers can cut from from their word diet?
If you have questions about writing style, or need advice on  how to tighten your writing, please ask. I’ll be around for a week, and I enjoy answering questions.
ONLINE CLASSES WITH RAYNE HALL

WRITING SCARY SCENES 
Are your frightening scenes scary enough? Learn practical tricks to turn up the suspense. Make your readers’ hearts hammer with suspense, their breaths quicken with excitement, and their skins tingle with goosebumps of delicious fright. Whether you’re working on a ghost story, a thriller, a paranormal romance, an urban fantasy or a romantic suspense, this workshop is perfect for planning or revising your scary scenes. One month, twelve lessons, twelve assignments. If you wish, you may submit a scene for critique at the end of the class.This class requires that students have mastered basic fiction writing techniques. It is not suitable for beginners.

October 2012: Hearts Through History $20
http://www.heartsthroughhistory.com/writing-scary-scenes/ 
 


THE WORD LOSS DIET

Tighten and tone your writing style, and use simple revision tricks to slim your manuscript in four weeks. Shed thousands of words without changing the plot! This class will make your manuscript shorter, your pacing faster, and your individual author voice stronger. 

Great for self-editing a manuscript before submission to agents and editors, or before indie-publishing. Students must have a full or partial manuscript of at least 20,000 words to work with for this hands-on workshop. 
One month, twelve lessons, twelve assignments. Please note: This is a tough class for authors who are serious about improving their writing craft. Some of the insights you gain about your own writing may come as a shock.

November 2012: Lowcountry RWA 

$16 

http://lrwa.thinkflowdesign.com/all-online-workshops/#NOV     

Rayne Hall is the author of a dark fantasy about a man trying to protect a kingdom and protect a woman…from himself.



Buy this for $2.99